Cartoon Laws of Physics

Someone has actually sat and thought about it all.

Not only is suicial ballon (.com) the type of domain name you dream of owning, but it is also compulsive viewing (for broadband users).

Escape!

Click read box. Hold Mouse Button down. Avoid Blue shapes. If you can beat 19.158 seconds you are officially better than me.*





(* GCB reserves the right to lie about his score at anytime, should anyone actually claim to have beaten the score above.)

Is it absolutly impossible to beat the computer connect 4?

LOL

NOTE: This was actually a team name a group of newcomers had in the pub quiz last week. Funny fuckers eh?

A quite exceptional game.

Gaming's Hottest Guys Pin-up Calendar!

Ebola.

You wouldn't want to get it, but why not recreate it?

It links to Googles Cache of gp4teens.com before "100 things to do with your boyfriend or girlfriend..Instead of it." was taken down. It is not surprising my current girlfriend and I base our relationship around sex and alchol.

Kaba Kick

Not the injured Sheffield United player, but some crazy Japanese kids game. You probably wont find it in Redgates.

Thanks to John for the link. Finns miss death in tax office. You need colleagues like that!

Top 10 most stupid lawsuits.

I used to have one of these. Plays just as badly now, as it did all those years ago.

I'm surprised this isn't on ebay

Too. Much. Time. On. Hands.

Man sentenced for marrying his 15-year-old cousin (who was also his Aunt)....

Were else can you see Winston Churchill play John Lennon at Tennis if not here?

My life has been rated:
See what your rating is!

With valentines day looming, perhaps this could save me a fortune.

Crazyfads.

Wonder if in 2000's (What is the proper name for that? Naughties?) buying a Stella Fridge on impulse from the local off licence for £90 will be in it. No? Just me on that one then. Idiot.

Zombie Infection Simulation v2.3

So thats what would happen when hell is full and the undead will walk the earth...

Bloody Handy (if your in London that is)

Dont get caught out by the cold snap, let The Weather Pixie tell you all about the weather in your location.

Bum Wines

Call them bum wines, street wines, fortified wines, wino wines, or twist-cap wines. Whatever you call these beverages for the economical drunkard, this page explores the top five, in alphabetical order. So curl up on a heating duct and enjoy...

"February, Morgan Spurlock decided to become a gastronomical guinea pig.
His mission: To eat three meals a day for 30 days at McDonald's and document the impact on his health. "

I know people who would think nothing of this!

IKEA - the game. A very detailed and accurate walkthrough.

Mountain Rescue. Quite addictive.

LOL. Answers on a postcard.

It's one for the broadband users, but is probably the most intriguing thing I've ever seen since that time Kylie Minogue snogged Gerri Halliwell on TFI Friday.

(BTW if anyone has some form of mpg of that incident, please be sure to drop it on by wont you...)

Heatherhaven.com

It's not quite porn, but I wouldn't call this a 6'5" (7'2" in her favourite heels) safe for work either, just, well, you know, a bit 'different'.

DJ Chip Butty in da house. (I think thats what those krazy kids say anyway)

And they wonder why fiel sharing is so rife. The bastards.

Can you imagine his response to the insurance company when they ask him if his car has been changed from the original specification... Geekdom taken to the extreme.

2 Guys and a keg, reported earlier last week are up and running. You can watch a live webcast of the event here.

Ananova - Jordan's boobs 'may explode' in jungle

Think I'll set the video, just in case.

Step by step guide tobuilding an igloo. Because you never know....

My Son Peter. I dont for a minute belive in ghosts, but this is spooky...

20 Questions Ask Jeeves Can't Answer.

If you havn't seen this yet, where have you been?

Flipper the sonic hedgehog?? Beware Flashing lights!

Jar of Toothpaste. It's the small things that make you a millionnaire - (espcially if you sell 80,000 of them).

Pathetic Geek Stories. aah...

A big hello to everyone coming today from Bloggerheads. Nice to see you all, have a good look round, but try not to touch anything that may break and schoolchildren only 2 at a time please.

1984 was the first season I ever started collectingPanini Football Stickers. As I recall, I got to within about 50 of completing it, and the torn tattered album is still in my parents attic. Anyone got any swops?

Wonder what the interview is like forthis job...

Mothers Given Back Babies They Thought Dead WTF???!!!!

A Man who took out insurance with Tesco has been told he cannot make a claim for legal costs - because he wanted to sue Tesco itself.

Could you *make* it up?

A clearly mad cow.

Needs sound to make any sense and if you have got sound at work, I and your company dont like a cow using the work fuck, I'd wait until you get home.

Whilst I couldn't quite get it working for sites I input, the recommended options of mixing one sites style with anothers content is quite effective.

Take the James Bond Car Quiz!

iSketch. Online pictionary. Quite good fun.

Politically incorrect but hey, he's a wierdo.

Germans eh? When their not invading Poland or making dodgy porn videos, they come up with pearlers like this.

I WANT ONE!

Two Guys and a Keg

I forward a proposal to make these two chaps hon. life members of Greasy Chip Butty. Ayes to the right? Noes to the left? ... Proposal accepted.

Test Results: "

What Classic Movie Are You?

"

The greasy chip butty song, as sung by a dog with a teenage american accent.

No really it is! Go see!

-Before you make that choice, think about your sperm.

Wife decides only way to make sure husband looks after baby correctly is to give him an online presentation on babysitting.

Understanding the lyrics of American Pie.

It could of course be full of shit, but at least it's creditable full of shit.

I find your lack of faith disturbing.

Geeks only

1 Terrabyte USB hard drives are here. Thats a lot of MP3's!

Read My Boobs! Yeah baby!

It's my birthday on February 2nd, and if any of you want to buy me a Mazda RX-8, please feel free. Look what it can do!

eh?

Chavscum

If you've ever been to Bracknell, you'll like this site.

Look, if some told me this last week, I would have laughed at them. But for baby Jesus' sake back all your important files up now. Not your proposed first ever novel in Word, or the 4GB of music you downloaded of the internet but stuff like your Mum and Dads Ruby wedding anniversary photos that you only ever downloaded onto your hardrive, or perhaps your school mates emails that you thought were safe just in outlook. You'll miss them when there gone. Nick a CD from work and let it burn while your having a big dump. You'll never regret it, I promise.

Basically, unless, like GCB is, uploaded onto an internet server I've lost everything. That includes EVERYONES EMAIL ADDRESS WHO HAS EVER CONTACTED ME!!! If in whatever capacity I've ever met you in the past 6 years and you aren't trying to make me me money in my sleep or improve my sex life with herbal remedies, please email me! The link is at the bottom the post. Go on, now I cant get in touch with you, I miss you!

:-)

WEST HAM UNITED FC SQUAD FOR SALE!!!

9 days to go....

Appologies for the lack of activity, my hard drive has died and it's taking a bit of time to get everything back up and running. Hopefully, normal service will be resumed soon.....:(

Not at all funny until you hover the mouse over John F. Kennedy's picture and read the ALT tab which is supposed to give people with graphics turned off, a clue as to what the picture is about.

Pretty cool.

IRC BIBLE

Eerily recognisable to anyone that has ever been in a IRC chatroom!

Belgium destroyed by rogue asteroid.

Look, it's 12:23 in the morning and between you and me, I've had a drink. But for the sake of Baby Jesus will you please sign my guestbook! I've had nearly 15,000 of you buggers round for tea and only 12 of you have ever bothered to sign the guestbook. Is it so much to ask? is it? is it? And as for the comments section you ungrateful bastards! Right. Where's the cheese....

As of now, I've got 1,766,345,867 seconds left to live. Readers, help me. Dont let me die a virgin!

If you didn't see it at the time Peter Kays banned John Smiths advert and another 9 adverts Americans will never see because they are so busy checking everyones passports at customs are here.

While ever Argos are selling personal CD players at about 12p each as much as I would love to see Cassette Deck to PC work I fear it is ultimatly doomed!

I dont know how it works, but the concept deserves praise.

Swearing is both big and clever

Stupid.Com - A complete waste of perfectly good technology

Gesichter des Orgasmus

eh?

Typo anyone?

To defend Men everywhere, his 19 year old mistress was probably much more up for it in bed than his clearly psychotic wife.

How others see you...


Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, and always interesting; someone who is constantly the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to your head. They see you also as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who will cheer them up and help them out.
.

If I'd have had a bad result I would of course thought that this test was a load of old bollocks.

We believe that every red-blooded American can feel a lot less guilty about eating those bovine friends of ours if they just apologize to a cow.

Artsits drawings whilst under the influence of LSD.

Man goes on Holiday, gives key to friend. Friend wraps entire appartment in Silver Foil - PICTURES INCLUDED!

QUESTION: 'My wife and I love the Lord with all our hearts, and we don't want to do anything to sin against Him. Our question is in the area of oral sex. Is it scripturally wrong for married couples?

Dont ask what I was doing when I found this...

Finally East Riding council bosses sent in a mechanical digger to finish the job. A spokesman said: “It was an unfortunate incident.

Theres nothing like a good Blank or Blanks after Christmas dinner.

They'll be dancing in the streets of Singapore tonight!

Riaz Sheikh, defending, said the damage was caused after his client accidentally knocked the Range Rover into gear.
Arliss's foot then became stuck between the accelerator and the brake pedal, which caused a domino effect, he added.

He probably didn't add that he was three times over the drink drive limit as a well...

Only in America...

Who was on the Cover ofTIME Magazine when you were born? Dorothy Hamill (who?) was mine.

Celery Posters For Sale

Yes, you did read it right.

The Yorkshire TV clock will bring back some memories to some people I'm sure!

More can be found here

The Hidden Song Archive

I actually heard a Robbie Williams song on one of his earlier albums that brought back a good memory. I think it is on the Life through a Lens album and I was on the job at the time and it nigh on nearly scared the shit out of me!

The 'Merry Xmas - you Cunt' at the end really spells out what Tramp O'Claus is really all about.

How To Mince A Hamburger:

"First, you have to get yourself some nice and (preferably cheap) meal. I used a local 3.95€ offer, which is about the top amount of money you can use for something as dumb as this"

One for Ben I think!

NOTE: Contains nudity. Not Safe for work. Not for the easily offended either. Oh just click it.

Be at one with your PC - with the help of your USB port.

YOUR ALL GAY.

And a message to all those people on Viewpoints that keep banging on about commas and bollocks!

We like the moon.

We do. We really like it.

Knock Knock.....

[YOU] Whos there...

Big ish

[YOU] Big ish who?

(The jokes in the comment and yes I did get the Peter Kay DVD for Xmas)

MESSAGE TO THE PERSON LOOKING FOR BADGER SEX GROUPS IN GOOGLE AND ENDING UP HERE.

GET THE FUCK OFF MY SITE.

PMS Alert

A couple of years ago I used to another program that predicted this, but then I ditched the mental cow and deleted it from my PC.

Times Square at New Year's Eve

Seemingly much better than the London 'Dont come to see the fireworks' warning on Xmas Eve but stay at home and watch it on TV instead. Humbug.

100 things to do in 2004.

Now, if your remote control aeroplane got stuck in power lines what would you do?
Fetch the metal pole and try and fish it out?

Happy new year everyone, thanks for all the emails wishing me well, normal service is now, more or less resumed!

Advice about a pension? Why not phone a Sex line instead?!