Greasy Chip Butty

Paul Dunn column: Bizarre tales from small claims court: "Just when you think you've heard it all, there's this:

About three years ago, a Greenville 20-something woman filed suit in Pitt County District Small Claims Court against her employer – a used car wholesale dealer. Seems she drove vehicles to various automobile auctions in North Carolina, South Carolina and Virginia and spent a good part of her waking hours on the road.

She claimed that all that driving – and sitting – was an occupational hazard because it had caused her butt to grow three times larger. Pitt County Magistrate James Cowan Jr. ruled against her, saying her rear end had ballooned because she snacked and ate fast food while she drove."

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Google Logo Maker

Greasychipbutty in colour .. looks fab !

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Four Leaf Clover how many can you find.

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Barney and Fred have just gone way up in my estimation.

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When Jaws becomes reality.

WARNING: CONTAINS GORE.

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.:: Tuesday, July 26, 2005

French Artist Designs Cow Lingerie

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Fantastic.

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The Men Commandments

Basic rules every man should live by.

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Did Microsoft Wipe Apple Off the Map?

Sort of.

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.:: Sunday, July 24, 2005

101 Greatest TV Themes EVER

Ohhh the memories !

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.:: Friday, July 22, 2005

Now that's gotta hurt

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Watch Me Change

Create a virtual male or female .. dress them up and watch them change ;o)

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If WW2 had a chat room it might go something like this.

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.:: Thursday, July 21, 2005

I know that cooking gives pleasure, but this takes the biscuit ....

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Nice work if you can get it !

So this is what Councillers really do at work !

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.:: Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Stop this cheeky chap from stealing your mouse. Bloody hell is he fast !

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It all starts tomorrow with the First Test at Lords .... Bring it On!

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How to stop thieves knicking your drink

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Google Moon - Lunar Landing Sites

Zoom right in.

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RallyTrophy

This is my work day taken care of !

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.:: Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Al Pacino Soundboard

HOW FUCKED UP YOU ARE!

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?????????

I suspect theres a lot more to this than meets the eye.

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Anagrams

Greasychipbutty has over 500 ... best of which I think is "gayest cry pub hit"

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101 uses for a mobile phone

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.:: Monday, July 18, 2005

Lots and lots of numbers

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Are You Younger Than You Think? Well for me yes, according to this test I am 2 years younger than I actually am :D

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.:: Saturday, July 16, 2005

The Monster Lab - FX Artist Gallery

Now clowns give me nightmares, I mean who the fuck finds them funny, but after looking at some of the SFX on these pages, it could change tonight !

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.:: Friday, July 15, 2005

If Mother knows best, mine certainly does after emailing me this:

Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. My
friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work
cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holiday's
hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of
endless family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your
intentions.

While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel
that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I
question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity
takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those
ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear
from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that
I eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some
stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few
cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you
went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do
more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by
causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue
marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me.
Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front
door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting
ridiculous.

I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in
order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My
entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken
(water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin, prior to going to
sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn,
the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily
activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like
to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great
stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when
I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order
to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances
above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than
Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we
can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,

Your biggest fan

Greasy Chip Butty

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.:: Thursday, July 14, 2005

For you Trekkies out there Capt. Jean Luc Picard on an out-take from the show, doing his famous vaudville act.

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Pencil Carving Gallery

A pencil is just not for writing you know.

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21st of July is the start of the Ashes Series. It is also the release date of this little beauty!

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Office Bow of Death.

Dont go into meetings without it.

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Golf Rage. Thats a new one.

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.:: Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Revenge of the Sith: The Abridged Script

I won't need to go and see the film now.

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.:: Sunday, July 10, 2005

Stealth boats

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.:: Friday, July 08, 2005

How to keep an idiot busy

Kept this idiot amused for a bit ;o)

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The Ipod Flea

You will be itching to use it !

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.:: Thursday, July 07, 2005

Who says you need a bottle opener to crack open a bottle of beer !

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Make your hand wobble

Best done drunk for maximum effect.

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.:: Wednesday, July 06, 2005

This is one Flasher you would like to meet

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This is from Japan but it's basically a clothes peg to make your nose grow bigger.

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Got a doberman but want him to look like a poodle have no fear, the ultimate dog accessory is here.

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So Ms Marina's claims to be experiencing "a moral trauma" - which only a payment of $300m (252m euros; £170m) can put right.

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Come on Britain!

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.:: Tuesday, July 05, 2005

This low-life drugs-pusher thought he could mess with State Trooper Frank Sincera, but Sincera had other ideas. Sincera executes a perfect California stop, and sends this renegade back where he belongs, IN JAIL

Sherriff John Bunnell's classic quotes.

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.:: Monday, July 04, 2005

Increadibly politically incorrect but I couldn't help smirking.

Page contains NSFW images as well for good measure.

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.:: Sunday, July 03, 2005

50 worst haircuts #25 has got to be a joke ... surely ?

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Top Gear eat your heart out !

*contains lots of flashing lights*

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Is it a boat .. is it a plane no idea, but I don't think it's gonna fit in my bath !

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Robot Dogs Dancing I like this, but the music don't arf get on yer nerves after a while.

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